Mark Hoppus–former bass player/singer for pop-punk band blink182 (note the lowercase “b”; very important)–posted this on his blog, citing it as the “best newspaper headline ever.” I don’t know what’s better: the fact that Mother Russia actually built a statue to memorialize the enema, or that Mark Hoppus’s sense of humor has graduated from dick-and-fart jokes to a more self-conscious irony. But wait! It gets better! About a month ago, he informed his loyal readers, that he would be appearing on television, “giving someone tips on playing the bass for their band’s upcoming battle of the bands competition. Given the fact that I taught myself how to play the instrument, and have terrible technique, I’m not sure that I helped the situation any, and if for some reason their band loses, the blame can be placed squarely on my shoulders.”

Come on, people! If Mark Hoppus can laugh at his own ironic self-worth, why can’t the rest of us? Why can’t we learn to appreciate him, and the rest of blink182, for all that they’ve done for us? I’m not saying that blink182 (ps that was the 182nd word. Coincidence?) will go down in history as the Jesus Christ of pop-punk; that award clearly goes to closeted Christian pop-punkers MxPx. But for some reason, Mark, Tom and Travis get shit on incessantly by snooty hipsters. So come on kids; let’s face the facts. Anyone who was a teen or adolescent in the late nineties/early aughts owned a blink182 album, and if they didn’t, then they didn’t have any friends. Hipsters are supposed to revel in irony; is blink182 somehow too ironic for them? Let’s review:

• FACT: Travis Barker is absolutely amazing drummer.
• FACT: Tom DeLonge is a pretentious fuck with a messiah complex and a strange obsession with UFOs (I will post my review of an Angels and Airwaves concert later).
• FACT: It would be nice to have a blowjob
• FACT: It would be nice to have a blowjob
• FACT: It would be nice to have a blowjob
• FACT: It would be nice to have a blowjob from your mom

Despite their innate lack of musical ability (excepting Travis), I would actually argue that blink182 was ahead of the times. They were innovative trendsetters; they were pop-punk visionaries. Hell, even the Jonas Brothers cite blink182 as one of their biggest influences: “I didn’t pay much attention to blink’s behavior. I was just listening to the music,” insists Kevin Jonas, prompting the collective hive mind of every 11-14 year-old girl in America to breathe a sigh of relief that her purity ring has not been worn in vain. Think of it this way: when “Dude Ranch” came out, and “Dammit” ruled the radio, no one cared about pop-punk. It was a a few years after Green Day first hit it big (and “Insomniac” wasn’t the greatest commercial success), and bands like Dishwalla were all the rage. It wasn’t until after blink182 released “Enema of the State” in the spring of 1999 that Sum41, New Found Glory, and the entire Drive-Thru Records catalog really hit it big. And then what happened? Despite it’s comical title, “Take Off Your Pants and Jacket” was full of clean guitar arpeggios, droning octave chords, and halftime breakdowns. Dare I say, the album was more post-pop-punk than anything. What does this remind you of? The next trend of punk-influenced bands, such as Thursday, or the later and more “mature” albums of every other pop-punk band after them. Finally, blink182 released their eponymous (and final) album, full of drum loops, phaser, ambient sounds, and droning guitar chords, an album much more reminiscent of “Disintegration” (is the best album, ever) and could almost be a seen as a less-intentional predecessor to the electronica-and-clean-guitar drenched indie rock bands that are popular today.

Again, I’m not praising blink182’s talent, and their apparent innovation was probably accidental at best, in the same way that the Ramones’ lack of talent drove them to try something new (Johnny Ramone’s sound is often considered one of the most difficult to replicate because he defied all convention on account of he had no idea what the fuck he was doing). But blink182 deserves to be appreciated for all their contributions to our adolescent lives (besides, middle school was full of much more embarrassing mistakes, like Jncos, bowl cuts, and hand jobs). Doesn’t everyone share those same fond memories of listening to the talking tracks on “The Mark, Tom, and Travis Show” in your friend’s room after school, rocking out to “The Party Song” or “Anthem, Pt. 2,” comparing secret tracks on “Take Off Your Pants and Jacket,” or attending the Pop Disaster Tour on Labor Day weekend? So get over yourselves: music doesn’t necessarily have to have talent or integrity to be enjoyable. It just needs to be fun, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Rumors have been circulating in the wake of Travis Barker’s plane crash that a blink182 reunion might be in the works sooner rather than later. Maybe I’ll see you there?

*if they were to play a 21+ show in a small club, it’d be fucking awesome