You know how they say that Europeans don’t know how to tip? Now you know the truth:
This bill comes from Joe Delucci’s Italian Restaurant in Bird Street, Lichfield, Staffordshire. How very British. The owner claims that the message was intended only for the kitchen staff, and that he has no idea how it ended up on the bill. Though they apologized profusely to the patrons (who paid a whopping £284.68, which only included a 10% gratuity. Can they adjust accordingly?), I think I’d still be pissed if I were them — even if it wasn’t MEANT to be on the check, “Suck My Dick Fuck Face” was still said by the restaurant in reference to them.
And they think we’re assholes in America….
Although, speaking of being assholes in America, I was at a Red Sox game recently, and the beer prices were absolutely insane. But here’s the catch: Miller Lite, Coors Lite, Bud Lite, Bud ‘Heavy’ (as some Neanderthal called it) all cost $7.25 for a cup. Guinness, Smithwick’s, Harp, Sam Adams Lager, Sam Adams Seasonal, and Harpoon IPA all cost $7.75. Amstel Lite and Heineken also cost $7.75, because apparently they qualify as “Premium” beers (side anecdote: I did a order a Bud Lite at one point, but just said ‘Bud’ because all they had at that specific station. The woman directed me elsewhere for a ‘Bud Heavy,’ and I told her ‘Lite’ was fine, but I couldn’t help but wonder how many people at a Red Sox game are that adamant about Bud ‘Heavy’ versus Bud Lite. Is there THAT big of a difference?). Naturally, it’s a baseball game, and I want to get drunk, so I bought the beer despite its steep price tag, and naturally, I splurged 50 cents more to get the “Premium” shit.
But I didn’t tip.
Maybe this does make me an American asshole. I realize that the people slinging the beer don’t set the prices, but I’m already paying twice as much for a beer as I’d pay at a normal bar, which is already about 5 times what I’d pay at a liquor store, but especially with a job and a bank account like mine in an economy like this, I need every dollar I can spare (for more beer). My girlfriend, who works in the service industry, was quite irate when she learned of my refusal to tip, but I just couldn’t help it. So now, I turn to you, dear culturefuckers: